Carolann M. Aschoff, P.C.

Sign that may point to a rocky road to divorce

Marriage is a partnership people mostly believe will last a lifetime. That is why it is no easy decision to ask ones partner for a divorce. In some case, both partners can come to an agreement that they have grown apart and that splitting up may be the best thing for all involved, but this is not always the case.

For some people in New Jersey, the prospect of an amicable divorce may not be in the cards. There are times where one spouse actively opposes the idea of a divorce. In fact, there are a number of telltale signs of the possibility of a less than amicable divorce process, which may act a warning signals.

One such a sign is the reaction of the partner when a wish to end the marriage is expressed. When the first reaction is one of anger that may change to vengeance, one should realize that the partner can be seen as a shame-based personality type who fears abandonment and believes him or herself unworthy of love. A second sign is when a partner aligns him or herself with the children and cannot seem to grasp that the legal process dissolves the agreement made between husband and wife.

A third sign is when there is no attempt from the reluctant partner to dispel initial fears, but rather fan the flames. Lastly, when the reluctant partner refuses to take any blame for the breakdown in the relationship. All blame is laid at the door of the person who initiated the process.

As these signs point to a possible rocky road during a divorce process, one may find it beneficial to obtain the help of a New Jersey family law expert to assist him or her through the difficult negotiations in order to reach a fair settlement. The assistance of a person to act as a go-between can help the couple avoid some of the pitfalls involved in reaching a divorce settlement. The assistance provided may even help to make the process more amicable.

Source:, "Signs of a 'Rougher than Average' Divorce", Ann Cerney, Sep. 5, 2017

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